Though virtual conversations will never be as powerful as being with someone live, your success depends on how fast you create an environment where people feel comfortable enough to say what is on their minds. You can create conditions necessary for growth and change by generating a sense of safety in your online conversations.

Online psychological safety

The brain is always evaluating how safe it is to offer thoughts and ideas, ask questions and mention mistakes. People must feel they will not be judged for what they share. Also, they must trust your intention is to be helpful, not to make them act in ways you or others would approve.

The psychologically safe environment you must create is more difficult in times of crisis and uncertainty, when people are experiencing high levels of fear and doubt. Social distancing is causing anxiety, depression and stress.The quality of your presence is more crucial to the effectiveness of your online conversations now more than ever.

Space psychology affects safety

In addition to your personal presence, the visible environment on your screen can increase or decrease warmth and safety. New School of Architecture and Design professor Dave Alan Kopec says lighting, colors, objects, and proportion have a direct impact on emotions and perceptions.What people see on their computer screen impacts their level of comfort.

Preparing your inner and outer space

Follow these five tips for managing your inner and outer space to establish a safe and trusting connection in your remote conversations:

1. Set the stage

Get dressed like it’s a regular workday. If people can see your room, make sure it is free of clutter. Zoom’s virtual backgrounds don’t always work, but if you use them, choose a professional image. Position yourself to have light in front of you so the image is smooth. Make sure you have enough power and bandwidth for undisrupted communications, or use the phone for your voice so you can display your video image. Look into the camera when you talk and listen. Have your head fill most of the screen so people feel you are with them, leaving a little breathing room between you and the top of the screen so you aren’t overwhelming. Turn off notifications on your phone and computer. Make sure there are no pets demanding attention.

2. Regulate your emotions

Release your stress before the call; you can’t hide it. Even virtually, they will feel your tension and judge you as lacking in warmth and engagement.

To release tenseness in your body, breathe in the emotions you want to feel, such as “curious and care.” If the conversation becomes emotionally challenging, maintain visual contact. It is better to state what you are feeling and why than trying to mask your emotions. Even fleeting changes in your expressions impact the conversation.

3. Be curious about their personal state before diving in

Inquire how they are feeling right now. Ask if anything that happened that day is still lingering in their thoughts and what they need to do to be present to the conversation. Even if they say they are ready to talk, give them space and time to shift their focus to what you think is most important.

4. Use reflective statements so they feel heard

The use of reflective statements help people sort through their thoughts and feel seen, heard and valued when they hear you replay their words. Use summarizing and paraphrasing to reflect what you hear. Ask about shifts in emotions you see them express. Start your sentences with, “So you are saying …,” “What seems to be most important to you is … ” or “What you were thinking when you got quiet and looked away?”

Your reflections create a deeper connection.

5. Be compassionately curious

Listen to their stories before pushing for solutions. Ask about the meaning of the words they choose to make sure you understand what they need right now. Determine if there is anything they are afraid they might lose. Help them examine the usefulness of their beliefs about the present situation and assumptions about the future. This will help them make decisions and plans.

Marcia Reynolds, Psy.D., is a world-renowned expert on inspiring change through conversations. She has delivered programs in 41 countries and reached many more people online. She has four award-winning books: “The Discomfort Zone,” “Wander Woman,” “Outsmart Your Brain” and her latest, “Coach the Person, Not the Problem.” Learn more at her website.

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All agree empathy is a leadership trait.

At the beginning of the year I read an article from Melinda Gates explaining how instead of setting a New Year’s resolution, she chooses a word of the year. Like Melinda, I was drawn to the simplicity of focusing on one word for 12 months.

I’ve always believed entrepreneurs have a strong sense of empathy because it’s at the core of what they do–understanding customer pain points to develop thoughtful solutions that meet customers’ needs. But empathy isn’t just good for business, it’s good for humanity. That’s why this year I’ve committed to focusing more on empathy in the workplace–to practice empathy as a leader and encourage others to do so.

Over the last five months, I’ve had some successes, and naturally, some failures. Here’s what I’ve learned.

Empathy can be learned.

Many amazing leaders openly discuss the importance of empathy–Brene Brown on how it’s good for relationships, Satya Nadella on how it’s good for innovation, and Tim Cook on how it’s good for inclusiveness.

One thing they all have in common is the notion that empathy can be learned–and they’re right. Research validates that those who believe empathy can be developed are more likely to engage in behaviors to help them develop it.

Empathy is contagious.

The best way to have your team adopt a more empathic mindset is to start with yourself. You’ll find its effect to be contagious which, in return, shapes work culture.

Take, for example, an employee who misspeaks in a meeting. If the manager responds with an outburst, the employee feels inadequate and as a result, the culture becomes timid over time. Alternatively, if the manager responds empathetically, they have the ability to shape an empathic culture that yields trust and inclusiveness.

Empathy requires connection.

Empathy is more than just responding–it’s connecting. In other words, digging deep within yourself to identify a feeling that is similar and then verbalizing how you feel with an individual.

I’ve found the best way to connect is to build trust, and the best way to build trust is to be transparent about your vulnerabilities. By doing so, it signals that it’s okay to not be okay. We can all, at some point, relate to not being okay.

Empathy can be challenging.

Being empathetic comes more naturally when you’ve been in a similar situation–it allows you to tap into the feelings you felt, and in return, you empathize with the individual. Where empathy is challenging is when it doesn’t come reflexively.

Alternatively, when we’re vulnerable and are challenging ourselves to be empathetic, we look for positive reinforcement in return. When empathy isn’t reciprocated, don’t give up.

By Marc LoreSerial entrepreneur, CEO of Walmart eCommerce U.S.@marcericlore, Published on: Jul 1, 2019 for Inc.com.

CMCAs’ Commitment to Following Strict Standards of Professional Conduct

An important – yet often overlooked – component of CAMICB’s Credentialing Program
requires a Certified Manager of Community Associations (CMCA) to adhere to a high standard of ethical conduct. This means Certificants must comply with the 10 CMCA Standards of Professional Conduct, which govern their professional activities.

Standards Flow Chart

These Standards of Professional Conduct, detailed at www.camicb.org/standards, range from understanding laws applicable to community association management, to being knowledgeable on association policies and procedures, to carrying out fiduciary responsibilities, and participating in continuing education coursework. A violation of any of these Standards of Professional Conduct may be grounds for administrative action and possible revocation of the CMCA certification by CAMICB. Abiding by these Standards of Professional Conduct help protect consumers and associations that hire or contract with community association managers.

“When a community association manager earns the CMCA, they’re pledging to uphold a strict code of professional conduct which is critical to the profession,” said Ron Perl, Esq., a Partner at Hill Wallack LLP, who leads the firm’s community association practice group. “This is more than understanding the many facets of community association management and troubleshooting challenging situations, it brings about accountability, responsibility and trust to the individuals the profession serves.” Read more …

CAI and many course providers have begun providing virtual education opportunities for community association managers to prepare and respond to the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic on their communities. Check out the List of Approved Continuing Education webpage and On-Demand List for upcoming course options. 

CAI has also launched the COVID-19 Resource Center, a dedicated webpage for information about how COVID-19 may impact community associations and how boards and managers may prevent, prepare and respond to an outbreak. We also continue to encourage managers to follow the latest guidance and updates issued by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.